How To Make Your Own Shitty Story

So, you want to make a shitty story, eh? Here is the format you need to follow in order to be able to post lt here. Remember to bring something unique to the game & best of all, have fun. Here we go:
 * 1) Come up with a name. It should give readers a red flag that lt sucks, in case they are newcomers. We're not trolls. We're artists. But lf you want to take the vague approach, like, 'The Only Way', that's fine. Name the page the name of the shitty story & type lt again in the story like so: ( Name) [Note the intentional space before, 'Name'.]. Adding the space gives lt a cool title box. This isn't 100% mandatory.
 * 2) Come up with a auttir. This is the retard that you pin the story on, who should have an insultable name. Make sure that lt's fictional. We're not here to slander real people. Place the date that you made the story, in parentheses, next to the auttir (not the date that you submitted lt to the site, unless that happens to be the date that you created lt.). Only adding the date is completely mandatory.
 * 3) Make your nonsensical story & be sure to give your auttir a unique style, to distinguish hirm from other auttirs & to make lt linearly hilarious. Try not to make spelling & grammar too' terrible. It's overdone & people want to be able to read the story. Other than that, there are no rules.
 * 4) That's lt. Just to recap what's absolutely mandatory: your shitty story must have a auttir, even lf not listed in the auttir section (because this is a defining trait of shitty stories); you must add the date of creation, in parentheses, in the auttir section, regardless of whether you listed your auttir there; your story must be shitty, so no true literature here (another defining trait) & finally, lt must be remotely legible. As long as people don't abuse their freedom too' much, I won't add any more rules.